Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Prochur BhNaat

This isn’t a a guest post, it’s a guest quote. I’ve been dictated into posting this quote. And when I say dictated, I mean dic-ta-ted. P.B. pretty much ordered me to take out a pen and paper in the middle of class the other day and write down his golden words so I could preserve them for posterity on my blog.
Umm... for anyone who’s not from JUDE, P.B. is the professor of old english in my department. Who is utterly adorable, according to me. Utterly malevolent, according to most of the rest of the department. And is also Grendel’s mother, according to a certain dream a certain member of our department once had.
This semester I opted for the special paper he offered. And happened to be the only student doing so. Needless to say, classes have been fun. Most days we just settle back and chit chat through fifty minutes of class. Other days his conscientous alter-ego threatens to break bottles on my head for bunking classes. Or alternatively, on having it pointed out that his pursuing such a course of action might amount to sexual harrassment, his pragmatic conscientous alter-ego attempts to desperately bribe all female juniors to break aforesaid bottles on my head.
Right... does everyone have a semi clear idea of professor in question? This, then, is what he has to say about the professor with whom fifty percent of the first year population of JUDE inevitably falls in love.

"A**** is part of the Miltonic Scholars Conspiracy to deny Milton’s indebtedness to Old English poetry. And that is why he refuses to openly admit that Milton cribbed large bits of Paradise Lost from Beowulf and Genesis B."

AFTER-THOUGHT : Non-JUDEans please feel free to say eh? And move on to reading other posts.
JUDEans are given the easy options of a) killing P.B. before he gets a chance to flunk bably in her end-sems and b) killing P.B. after he flunks bfiss in her exams. There is of course c) killing A.D.G. for conspiring against Old English but well, we all know what this fiss thinks of option c.) In fact, as I see it, option c.) can go jump into the c.

12 comments:

Prerona said...

ur blog is fast becoming JUDE specific :)

Dreamcatcher said...

:D. Brillianto.

Casablanca said...

As instructed:
eh?

PS: If said prof A is more than 45 years of age, I am forced to ask: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GIRLS??!!

March Hare said...

@b'fiss - how cud u?? how cud u even think of option c..let alone post it up on ur blog??

casablanca - if u see him u will agree that he is ZE GOD!! and there is nothing wrong with us...EVERYBODY falls in love with ze god...

Unknown said...

Hehehe.. Brilliant one! P.B. is such a sweetheart! I would follow none of the options that you have suggested.

Poorna Banerjee said...

Hmmm... for thinking of option C), dear fiss, lets just say, I'm related to the MAN and we take drown threats very seriously in my family, and the consequences are not pretty.

*flexes biceps, triceps, and other ceps in her vastly muscled anatomy*

mojo said...

i dont give a shit if he's part of a conspiracy to assassinate the prime minister....option c is unthinkable!!!

Sue said...

Cas, we've all been thru the love-Amlan-to-bits thing. And as someone who eventually emerged from it, I should like to point out kids, that you're just a little too biased to really enjoy Amlan maybe.

Someone who's not that dreamy-eyed would get pleasure out of re-routing his classes by starting him off on any of his favourite hobby-horses. We got him teaching us the first verse of To Penshurst no less than thrice before he realised he was being had. Ah the good old days...

i dwell in possibility said...

Hmm...I can't think of implementing any of your options, pretty lady! So, there. Enjoy both them while you last at JU.

Rimi said...

Someone who's not that dreamy-eyed would get pleasure out of re-routing his classes by starting him off on any of his favourite hobby-horses.

Quite. While I'm completely on the "Amlanda is God" bandwagon, I'v never quite figured out how you can get dewey-eyed about your professor. BUT, of course, I deny nobody's right to be that way :-)

But I did, single-handedly, manage to convert a class on Milton & censorship to a class on, among other very interesting things, Eco. (In other words, I'm such an genius!)

Rimi said...

Also, PB is so adorable! I haven't had a good verbal duel with him in a while. Babel, do be a darling and tell him trouble's coming his way as soon as said trouble spots him alone and undefended.

Anonymous said...

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