this blog will be funny.....ah yes, me hearties this blog will be as hearty as a drunk broken heart can make it......imagine me, or on second thoughts don't imagine me exactly, imagine say bianca castafiore.....we have much in common; the build, the tendency to go off on a high pitch, alas alas I have no jewels past compare but I can cause neighbours to vacate their flats once I start singing in the shower........anyway to return to the imagining.....ah yes....
imagine a bianca like figure in a meena kumari style pose.....at this point though even my vivid imagination balks........
imagine instead, someone who all her life has worn her heart on her sleeve......metaphorically of course, since she much prefers sleeveless.....
imagine a fish who takes the bait every damn time.........because this time, just this time the world may be wrong and that worm might not conceal a hook.....
imagine a china vase that's been broken and repaired over and over again till you don't know where the cracks leave off and the design starts......
erm, this isn't really a funny post.....I'm sorry but I just realized the ironic bit about pretentious self-mockery is it's heads you laugh, tails I cry and either way I'm miserable...... and it's really tough trying to be funny when I'm howling so loud all the dogs of the city and its nearest suburbs are vocally expressing their collective sympathy outside my gate......
like Rincewind I have also come to the conclusion that somebody up there is looking out for me.......otherwise there are just too many coincidences keeping me alive.....wouldn't it be just my luck that the days I wanna die
a) dad's razor blade looks real rusty,
b) my ex-bf claims his revolver is at a friend's house,
c) the fuse gets blown two seconds before i brace myself to get that finger in the socket
d) it's sunday morning and the metro won't start till 3 o'clock in the afternoon
e) there's a curfew on the streets of calcutta so there isn't even a cycle let alone a bus to run over me
and the list actually goes on.........I repeat, someone up there is watching out for me.......Aaaaaaaaargh!!!!!!!!!